Phobiacs??

   After a long hiatus, like it or not, I am back to blog again. I wish I had a really cool excuse for my absence, like “Aliens had abducted me” or “I was off discovering the last number of Pi”, but the truth is that I have simply been too busy to write. During my absence I have been bombarded with ideas for blogs and have hurriedly scratched a few of them down for future writings. I genuinely enjoy writing as it gives me a place to “vent” and often “come to terms” with my daily battles of life. I told someone a few weeks ago that I find the writings to be somewhat “therapeutic” and hope to be able to carry them on for a long time. But I digress ….on to my twisted thoughts…


   I was recently informed of the word “Anatidaephobia”. You may ask yourself, as I did, what in the hell this word means. Well, by definition, it is simply; “The fear that somewhere, somehow, a duck is watching you.” Yep. You read that right. By all means, don’t take my word for this; take a moment to Google it. Back already? This word may come off as “comical” to some, but I saw it to be something far more disturbing. Who decided that we would now give “duck-a-phobics” a new name? You see, as far as I am concerned, we already have a word for someone who suffers from this; CRAZY! In my reality, people who expressed this fear would be placed in a padded cell with limited visitation and huge quantities of relaxing narcotics pumped into their system. Now I am not saying that if a person has a “phobia” they are automatically labeled as “crazy”, (I personally have claustrophobia; fear of tight quarters), but I do think that we have spent WAY too much time concocting words for a condition that has already been named. Our society today is so concerned with making everyone into cookie-cutter copies of the next guy that they feel the need to “diagnose” every difference that ultimately surfaces in people, as we tell them that “everything will be o.k.” Why does today’s society try to impose that all personalities are to be accepted? Do we really want, or need lunatics “fitting in” to our daily work force? I personally do not feel comfortable with a person who suffers from Anatidaephobia being in charge of launching our country’s nuclear missiles.

   The “diagnoses” do not stop with this instance. I found many more that I considered to be a waste of time, as they ALL fell into the same category in my mind; CRAZY. None the less, here are a few that I felt compelled to share:

1. Apeirophobia- Fear of infinity (I think this one definitely falls into the “crazy” category)

2. Arachibutyrophobia - Fear of peanut butter sticking to the roof of the mouth (Ditto)

3. Chirophobia- Fear of hands (It is going to be hard to overcome this one, even with counseling )

4. Ergophobia- Fear of work (We normally refer to this as “lazy”)

5. Hoplophobia- Fear of firearms (Commonly known as “Democrats”)

6. Lachanophobia- Fear of vegetables (Hold it, they may have one here, as I think my son may have this one)

7. Opiophobia- Fear medical doctors experience when prescribing needed pain medications for patients (OMG!!!! now we are diagnosing the doctors that are diagnosing us?)

8. Panophobia or Pantophobia- Fear of everything (Yep, even a name for that)

9. Phobophobia- Fear of phobias (Hey, while we are making names up, why not?)

10. And finally…….wait for it…… Hippopotomonstrosesquipedaliophobia- Fear of long words (Someone actually concocted this word and THEN had it printed and accepted to the Encyclopedia of Medical Terms, Wow!)

   I think that we can all agree this “label-maker” attitude of making everything seem acceptable by re-naming it is ridiculous. Let’s call a “spade” a “spade” and see people and their “afflictions” for what they are. I have enough trouble spelling the words in today’s dictionary without adding these monstrosities.